Tuesday, February 14, 2012

Cupid, Bring Me More Chocolate Wine

A small boy in diapers is going to shoot me in the ass with an arrow and I'm going to fall in love?

Was some pervert drinking when he thought this up?

If he was drinking, I hope he was sipping a lovely glass of chocolate wine.
Yes, chocolate wine.

Just when you think life has beaten you down and there is nothing pleasurable in your life, your Facebook friend casually mentions that she's drinking chocolate wine.

Yeah, I assumed she was drunk. Perhaps she was. That's when I do some of my best Facebooking.

I thought she meant she was drinking wine and eating chocolate. Turns out she is my new heroine for introducing me to chocolate wine. What's next, cupcake vodka?

I was a chocolate wine virgin, but that ended Monday night. Well, Monday late afternoon, but don't judge me.

Chocolate wine takes two perfect items and blends them into perfection. Remember those fabulous Reece Peanut Butter Cup commercials where a girl is walking with an open jar of peanut butter and a silly boy with a chocolate bar runs into her? Two great tastes that taste great together!

Well, I'm no advertiser, but I think I know the perfect commercial for chocolate wine.

A woman sits alone at a bar drinking a glass of wine. George Clooney comes in with chocolate syrup and squirts some into her glass. The camera zooms in and the woman sips the wine and smiles demurely. Cupid steps out from behind the bar and shoots George Clooney in the ass with an arrow. Camera zooms in closer to reveal that I am the woman at the bar.
The end.

Geez, this is good wine.

Cupid? Hey, little naked winged boy, bring me more chocolate wine, please.

Happy Valentine's Day!

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