Every once in a great while I have an epiphany. Something that was once confusing and complicated is revealed to me clearly and simply.
Not to brag, but the other day I had an epiphany. A pretty significant one.
Yeah, I realized how to achieve world peace.
I'm sure this is valuable information, and I'm probably stupid and naive for sharing it so broadly. I should probably call Homeland Security, the CIA, or whoever is responsible for finding the way to create world peace. I mean, really, I probably will get the Nobel Peace prize for this one. It is that significant. Consider yourself lucky to hear it from me first.
Ok. Here goes...
The key to world peace is to equip everyone with a high quality air conditioner.
There is conflict in the Middle East because they are HOT.
Hot, hot, hot.
Heat makes people rabid in their irritability. I know this first hand because my loving family of four recently spent 9 days without electricity. We were loving to one another one minute, and in the next minute, it was scary ugly. We were unarmed so no one actually died. I can only imagine the destruction that armed hot people can create.
While we are equipping everyone with air conditioners, I think we should also give every family and organized terrorist organization a dishwasher. When you are hot it is one thing, but when you are hot and surrounded by dirty dishes, it's enough to make you want to go fight with the first person you see. In my case that's my husband, but it could just as easily be Afghanistan.
Do you see the brilliance behind my plan?
Cool the world off. Coolness = peace.
In fact, I'm fairly certain PEACE is an acronym for:
E. Everyone with
E. Eliminate war
Wonder where I should keep my Nobel Peace Prize?
Perhaps next to my Pulitzer.